New Stories for 5/26/2015
So maybe she should have chosen a more recent photo for her dating profile. It wasn’t a flagrant misrepresentation necessarily but people do change over six years. A sedentary thirty-seven year old may lack the – oh what was the phrase she was looking for? – skin elasticity of an active and exercise obsessed thirty-one year old.
Glad I got past that phase, thought Dana. Talk about self absorbed. The money one could blow through on a healthy kick differed not a great deal from the dough one could squander on a destructive vice. In fact the occasional pack of cigarettes and fifth of vodka cost a lot less than a monthly gym membership, bottles of nutritional supplements, a Jack LaLanne power juicer, and those special arch supporting cross training shoes. And that didn’t even factor in the cost of groceries. Try eating only organic, non-GMO foods and see what that costs a person? Sheesh. If she had maintained a healthy life-style for any longer than the year and a half she obsessed over it, she’d be in hawk to the credit card companies for the rest of her life. Well, that would probably happen anyway; which was one of the reasons she’d slipped in that preference for a mature, financially stable fellow when she signed on to the Heavenly Yoked website.
My first serious relationship with a member of the opposite sex was back in the 2nd grade. This was before I ever got nervous in front of girls. They were not yet the threat that they would one day become. Don’t get me wrong, of course I kissed a few girls before that point. Yeah, that mountain got climbed way back in kindergarten during nap time. But 2nd grade was when I took the next step and plunged into a committed relationship.
I don’t remember too much about that whirlwind romance which took place in the halls of Madison Cross Roads Elementary, but what I do remember was incredible.
She sat next to me in Mrs. William’s class and she was beautiful. She was more of what you’d an uptown girl, living in her uptown world while I was more of a rough bad boy type that was too busy running from Johnny Law to be bothered with keeping myself presentable.
I think that natural rebellious attitude is what drew her to me initially.
We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us. — Joseph Campbell
Rummaging under a stack of papers in my office I ran across a thin book purchased weeks before then set aside as the reason for it faded. Less than 120 pages, I decided to run through it quickly and be done.
Alice Miller’s The Drama of the Gifted Child had been an online recommendation to someone else but I thought I might uncover a nugget or two for myself. I settled into my office chair at home to zip through as much as possible before bed.
Twelve pages in I came across these words, “…for the emptiness is real.”
And suddenly my universe collapsed, all of the faulty trusses and jerry-rigged supports and facades cracked snapped crumbled. As did I, tumbling from my chair to the floor. The dam holding back the reservoir of unshed tears blew apart, releasing a grief I never knew existed. The words echoed in my head.